[And sure enough he's there at the entrance to the village's communal living spaces within the span of a few minutes, panting through his teeth with his hands on his hips while he scouts out the local faces. There's a chance he was wrong about Anakin's location (things he should have asked before setting a timed limit— what if he's just shot himself in the figurative foot re: getting a lightsaber? what if Anakin thinks he's not taking this seriously?) but it's already too late for second guesses: running off now means he might accidentally overlook a face in the crowd and miss his friend entirely.]
[ waiting on the edges of the crowd, safely ensconced in the shade of a balcony, anakin spots finn a short time after his arrival. he should have felt finn's arrival. non-force users are always more difficult to locate, but familiarity and time made it easier, both of which necessity had obliged. it should not have been a problem.
another dilemma. his connection to the force waned each day. it felt like slowly going blind.
pushing away from the wall, he calls, ] Finn! [ one hand raised to get finn's attention. the lightsaber is kept out of view inside one of his voluminous sleeves. these people were unlikely to recognize it for what it is. regardless, anakin is not so crass to wave a weapon over their ( very, very short ) heads.
for the moment, he has extricated himself from luke. asking someone to keep an eye on his son while said son was present presumably would not go over too well. it wasn't that anakin did not trust luke; luke, like finn, were among the few anakin did.
he just does not trust luke not to somehow lock himself in a closet or go swimming without swimming well or decide to visit a volcano's crater because why not?? it's right there???? ]
[And there it is: relief in the form of a familiar face. Finn flashes the start of a smile as he sets forward again, slower this time, lifting a hand to wipe the sting of salt-sweat from his cheeks, his brow. Even without the Force, the closer Finn gets, the easier it is to see the way his eyeline darts expectantly, practically broadcasting the fact that what he's looking for isn't exactly what he sees.
If he had time to mull it all over, he might consider it strangely ironic, getting so worked up about something as unthinkable as being gifted a lightsaber— let alone his own. But the truth of the matter is, he's learned the hard way it's just about the only surefire defense against Kylo Ren, and he's tired— really, really tired— of watching good people take the brunt of it because of him. So sure, it's scary in a way he's not exactly staring down at the moment (something he knows he'll have to stare down later, once the adrenaline dies off) but it's also a means to stand on his own. To be something more.
[ strongly convinced that finn might explode if anakin plays keep away, he produces the lightsaber. lighter, more slender than his second lightsaber with a black lens housing in place of silver. every piece, from its housing to the grip to the kyber crystal he himself found and activated, designed and molded to his exacting specifications. a good lightsaber. he, who already favored strong blows, needed a strong weapon. seven years, it served him well.
anakin holds it out. ]
This weapon is your life. [ solemn now; a lightsaber is no toy, and what he's asking not a game. ] It's a great responsibility. Remember that.
[Finn's young. It's obvious in the way that he tackles the world itself in spite of everything he's lived through, or how there's no iron-clad commitment to closing himself off; at times, it's easy to think that's all there is to him.
But he's still a soldier.
Maybe not vetted-- not tried and true the way that real troopers, not cadets, were-- but he was raised with a squad behind him (his responsibility, Phasma had told him time and time again) and for almost the entirety of his life that was all he knew. So once Anakin meets his stare with the expectation of commitment, the switch from Finn to FN-2187 comes quick. Clean. He doesn't blink; he doesn't look away for a second, hands still at his side to show the full depth of his priorities.] As long as I live.
[ and anakin a general, tested and proven. not born to be a soldier as the clones were, not raised as one as finn had been. ( he had been born to serve, but in a different manner, for another inhuman purpose. ) the war forgave no one and exempted no one, especially not those who would keep the peace.
three years spent at the frontline, risking himself along with his soldiers, relying on one another time and time again. clones all of them. all of them individuals; all of them different. and among those under his command, the bravest, most loyal men anakin had the honor of knowing.
if the jedi taught him the value of peace, among the clone troopers, he gained patience, restraint and a sense of camaraderie he sought without being aware of the depths of his starvation.
anakin knows soldiers. finn proved himself when they met: again and again and again tolerating the impossible in order to protect another. not only is this an easy decision, it feels right.
expression relaxing to a soft urging, anakin glances to the weapon. ] It's yours.
[There's a weight to it when he takes the saber from Anakin, not from metal or the components wrapped up safely inside, but because there's a meaning to the exchange: in the vast expanse of the galaxy itself he's seen only two. And people run from them, fear them, look up to what a lightsaber stands for even if they don't really know the stories by heart. In truth, he doesn't think he deserves it.
That doesn't mean he can't earn it, though.]
Thank you.
[And for that, grip locked tight around the hilt, he finally flashes a grin.] You know for what it's worth, I'm glad you're still around.
[There's something about the comment that stings in a way that it shouldn't. He doesn't flinch, doesn't show it or wear it on his sleeve beyond the softening of his own smile, but it's there all the same: he might as well be back on D'qar, meeting Poe Dameron's stare and hearing for the first time in his life that he was a good man. That he was capable of more.
He knows Anakin couldn't have meant to echo the friend he's still raw from losing; flashes the careful twitch of a residual, appreciative grin before letting it fade with a nod. The pad of his thumb scuffs the edge of one of the saber's ports.] I try.
[For an ex-trooper like him, he figures that's all there is to it.] So...Luke.
[ lips pressing into a thin line, anakin looks away. his feet carry him — not far and without any real desire to walk away but needing to act on some of his nervous energy. ]
He's inexperienced and eager to prove himself. [ never a good combination. he stops with a heavy sigh. ] I don't know how long he'll listen to me.
[ the note of panic behind his eyes when he looks at finn would be comical were the situation different. and yet, confronted with a son three years his junior, panic may be his most rational reaction yet. ]
It's a big deal. I get it— [ Dealing with having his father so close to someone that wants him dead has to be— wait.
Wait one freaking minute.
And it clicks, then, what Anakin had mentioned earlier. What Finn discarded in passing out of being entirely overwhelmed: he said Luke was young. Not only that, now he's saying he's experienced as well? No. No that doesn't make any sense.] How can Luke Skywalker be—
Kylo Ren wants to murder a teenage version of the guy that he trained under. Like a million years ago.
[His lips draw out into a thin line; he inhales once. After a certain point, 'surreal' doesn't even begin to cover it - but after losing his friends, getting put on literal babysitting duty watching over one of the galaxy's greatest legends, sharing space with Kylo Ren and being gifted a lightsaber, shutting off his brain just sounds more appealing than ever. So you know what, screw it, he does:] Yep. Got it.
if ren trained under luke, ren who fell to the dark, luke had been his master. luke does become a jedi. he takes on someone who, if ren is to be believed, was his nephew. and the padawan turned on the master. the nephew turned on his uncle.
both are a betrayal. both are anathema to anakin. but the latter is more unforgivable. the latter is of family. for someone who values family so highly, the thought of bringing any of his family to harm makes him ill. for ren to have betrayed luke — ]
I think he could use a friend, [ anakin corrects him quietly. refocusing on the task at hand. luke wasn't raised in the temple; he grew up with a family. friends. protectors. ones that could have done a better job, admittedly. ( obi-wan should have known better. obi-wan should have done more. )
thing is, anakin isn't sure he can fit the bill.
his eyes slide to the lightsaber in finn's hand. a ghost of a smile twitches his lips. ]
And I think you could both use the opportunity to practice.
[Friends. With Luke Skywalker. He'd already known Han Solo, met General Organa— it shouldn't be as odd to consider as it is when Anakin earnestly presses the suggestion into his figurative palms. But it is. It is because it's unreal.
His stomach feels light; he feels...anxious, somehow. This is really happening.] Can't argue with that.
How will I know him when I see him? [He doesn't trust the First Order's archival vids: too much bias, too much tampering.]
He's hard to miss. Asks a lot of questions, carries a lightsaber. [ a beat. ] Looks like me.
[ reminds me of his mother. strange how a boy who never knew either of them could be so much like them. ]
I know I'm asking a lot of you. If you'd prefer to stay out of this… [ anakin suspects he does. he has found an odd sense of kinship with this stormtrooper who would prefer to spend his hours among loved ones and forget the world outside exists.
how many times has he not wished the same? how many nights has he not wished he could be with padmé again, overlooking the shimmering lakes of naboo, alone and at peace? he wants the war over to bring to justice those responsible for the suffering of the galaxy, yes. but he wants the war over to be over. he had come so close to ending it himself…
he does not want to fight any more than he has to. he wants his friends safe. he wants his wife close. he wants to meet his son, hold him in his arms when luke is still small and new and promise him the galaxy if he wants it.
but luke's safety is paramount to him. finn fought his battles, and it cost him. his injuries were burned into anakin's mind the first time he glimpsed them; he saw them again and dressed them again and felt the echoes of pain again every few hours until they separated.
what he's asking is not to be taken lightly, nor does he. the same decency he paid to rex, to fives, to any of his men when even he recognized that what he was asking stretched the limits of human capacity or the parameters of their command, anakin leaves the choice up to finn. ]
[The only problem with that dream is the fact that the people Finn cares about most aren't around anymore. And he could stay hunkered down, keep his head in the figurative sand and forget what it means to have to wake up and fight without a reprieve— but ever since Poe and Rey left? It's been miserable. Pointless.
Lonely.
So even if it is crazy, committing to Anakin's plan (and it is), it's still better than wallowing or wasting away. Better than leaving the only friend he has left alone to struggle with something he clearly doesn't know how to handle.
They've come too far for that. Together.]
Nah. [Quiet, casual. As easy as waving away a question about the weather or what he might want to eat for dinner later on that night. And it comes with the slow side of a smile that's nothing short of reassuring: Anakin clearly needs the brace of it.] I'm good.
What kind of a friend would I be if I ran out on you now?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ empty threat is empty, but this just about the best thing he's had all week, thanks finn. ]
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6 minutes later because HUSTLING;
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another dilemma. his connection to the force waned each day. it felt like slowly going blind.
pushing away from the wall, he calls, ] Finn! [ one hand raised to get finn's attention. the lightsaber is kept out of view inside one of his voluminous sleeves. these people were unlikely to recognize it for what it is. regardless, anakin is not so crass to wave a weapon over their ( very, very short ) heads.
for the moment, he has extricated himself from luke. asking someone to keep an eye on his son while said son was present presumably would not go over too well. it wasn't that anakin did not trust luke; luke, like finn, were among the few anakin did.
he just does not trust luke not to somehow lock himself in a closet or go swimming without swimming well or decide to visit a volcano's crater because why not?? it's right there???? ]
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If he had time to mull it all over, he might consider it strangely ironic, getting so worked up about something as unthinkable as being gifted a lightsaber— let alone his own. But the truth of the matter is, he's learned the hard way it's just about the only surefire defense against Kylo Ren, and he's tired— really, really tired— of watching good people take the brunt of it because of him. So sure, it's scary in a way he's not exactly staring down at the moment (something he knows he'll have to stare down later, once the adrenaline dies off) but it's also a means to stand on his own. To be something more.
That's the part he likes.] Did you bring it?
[Translation: hi.]
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anakin holds it out. ]
This weapon is your life. [ solemn now; a lightsaber is no toy, and what he's asking not a game. ] It's a great responsibility. Remember that.
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But he's still a soldier.
Maybe not vetted-- not tried and true the way that real troopers, not cadets, were-- but he was raised with a squad behind him (his responsibility, Phasma had told him time and time again) and for almost the entirety of his life that was all he knew. So once Anakin meets his stare with the expectation of commitment, the switch from Finn to FN-2187 comes quick. Clean. He doesn't blink; he doesn't look away for a second, hands still at his side to show the full depth of his priorities.] As long as I live.
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three years spent at the frontline, risking himself along with his soldiers, relying on one another time and time again. clones all of them. all of them individuals; all of them different. and among those under his command, the bravest, most loyal men anakin had the honor of knowing.
if the jedi taught him the value of peace, among the clone troopers, he gained patience, restraint and a sense of camaraderie he sought without being aware of the depths of his starvation.
anakin knows soldiers. finn proved himself when they met: again and again and again tolerating the impossible in order to protect another. not only is this an easy decision, it feels right.
expression relaxing to a soft urging, anakin glances to the weapon. ] It's yours.
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That doesn't mean he can't earn it, though.]
Thank you.
[And for that, grip locked tight around the hilt, he finally flashes a grin.] You know for what it's worth, I'm glad you're still around.
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but he's smiling, more warmly now. ]
You're a good man, Finn.
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He knows Anakin couldn't have meant to echo the friend he's still raw from losing; flashes the careful twitch of a residual, appreciative grin before letting it fade with a nod. The pad of his thumb scuffs the edge of one of the saber's ports.] I try.
[For an ex-trooper like him, he figures that's all there is to it.] So...Luke.
Does he know about this plan of yours?
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[ lips pressing into a thin line, anakin looks away. his feet carry him — not far and without any real desire to walk away but needing to act on some of his nervous energy. ]
He's inexperienced and eager to prove himself. [ never a good combination. he stops with a heavy sigh. ] I don't know how long he'll listen to me.
[ the note of panic behind his eyes when he looks at finn would be comical were the situation different. and yet, confronted with a son three years his junior, panic may be his most rational reaction yet. ]
I don't know what to do.
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Wait one freaking minute.
And it clicks, then, what Anakin had mentioned earlier. What Finn discarded in passing out of being entirely overwhelmed: he said Luke was young. Not only that, now he's saying he's experienced as well? No. No that doesn't make any sense.] How can Luke Skywalker be—
Are you telling me he's a kid?
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yes.
anakin, you're twenty fucking two just because you can legally drink in the us]1/3
[o k.]
2/3
[Sure. Ok. That's normal. That makes sense.]
3/3
[His lips draw out into a thin line; he inhales once. After a certain point, 'surreal' doesn't even begin to cover it - but after losing his friends, getting put on literal babysitting duty watching over one of the galaxy's greatest legends, sharing space with Kylo Ren and being gifted a lightsaber, shutting off his brain just sounds more appealing than ever. So you know what, screw it, he does:] Yep. Got it.
[This is fine.]
So you want me to follow Luke around without actually letting him know what's up. And you think he'll be okay with that.
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if ren trained under luke, ren who fell to the dark, luke had been his master. luke does become a jedi. he takes on someone who, if ren is to be believed, was his nephew. and the padawan turned on the master. the nephew turned on his uncle.
both are a betrayal. both are anathema to anakin. but the latter is more unforgivable. the latter is of family. for someone who values family so highly, the thought of bringing any of his family to harm makes him ill. for ren to have betrayed luke — ]
I think he could use a friend, [ anakin corrects him quietly. refocusing on the task at hand. luke wasn't raised in the temple; he grew up with a family. friends. protectors. ones that could have done a better job, admittedly. ( obi-wan should have known better. obi-wan should have done more. )
thing is, anakin isn't sure he can fit the bill.
his eyes slide to the lightsaber in finn's hand. a ghost of a smile twitches his lips. ]
And I think you could both use the opportunity to practice.
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His stomach feels light; he feels...anxious, somehow. This is really happening.] Can't argue with that.
How will I know him when I see him? [He doesn't trust the First Order's archival vids: too much bias, too much tampering.]
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[ reminds me of his mother. strange how a boy who never knew either of them could be so much like them. ]
I know I'm asking a lot of you. If you'd prefer to stay out of this… [ anakin suspects he does. he has found an odd sense of kinship with this stormtrooper who would prefer to spend his hours among loved ones and forget the world outside exists.
how many times has he not wished the same? how many nights has he not wished he could be with padmé again, overlooking the shimmering lakes of naboo, alone and at peace? he wants the war over to bring to justice those responsible for the suffering of the galaxy, yes. but he wants the war over to be over. he had come so close to ending it himself…
he does not want to fight any more than he has to. he wants his friends safe. he wants his wife close. he wants to meet his son, hold him in his arms when luke is still small and new and promise him the galaxy if he wants it.
but luke's safety is paramount to him. finn fought his battles, and it cost him. his injuries were burned into anakin's mind the first time he glimpsed them; he saw them again and dressed them again and felt the echoes of pain again every few hours until they separated.
what he's asking is not to be taken lightly, nor does he. the same decency he paid to rex, to fives, to any of his men when even he recognized that what he was asking stretched the limits of human capacity or the parameters of their command, anakin leaves the choice up to finn. ]
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Lonely.
So even if it is crazy, committing to Anakin's plan (and it is), it's still better than wallowing or wasting away. Better than leaving the only friend he has left alone to struggle with something he clearly doesn't know how to handle.
They've come too far for that. Together.]
Nah. [Quiet, casual. As easy as waving away a question about the weather or what he might want to eat for dinner later on that night. And it comes with the slow side of a smile that's nothing short of reassuring: Anakin clearly needs the brace of it.] I'm good.
What kind of a friend would I be if I ran out on you now?
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[ humor. not just good for pissing off sith lords.
anakin turns with a little bow of of his head. before he goes far, he looks back. ] You have today to get used to it. Tomorrow, beach at dawn.
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